Have you ever felt stuck in an unending cycle of tired with no rest in sight? If you’re a mom, yes. If you’re past the age of mandatory nap times, probably. Chris and I had THE BEST DATE NIGHT EVERRRRR on Friday night. We were celebrating a new season of life. God making ways for us in ministry that are incredible. We chatted about the ups and down we’d been through since we got married while we drove to the restaurant. While we parked, Chris said, “But you know what’s different about this season? For the first time, we’re not doing it alone.” It was the perfect setup. He didn’t know that I had arranged a surprise - friends were meeting us there!

Last night was one of those nights where chewing was the loudest sound at the dinner table. Conversations were stifled, and you could taste the tension. Here’s the deal... Things have been GREAT! Chris and I are better than ever. I love him more deeply with each day. God has been opening doors, answering prayers, and we are completely overwhelmed by His favor in our lives. Annnnnnnd we have an 18-month old who is developing beautifully in all the appropriate ways. (Ie: sounds, spills, squeals, screams.)

It’s a fresh new week, and it’s time for a fresh face. No matter what last week (or last night) dished out, let’s pick up our shield of faith, remind ourselves that we have a hope that does not disappoint, and put on love.

**And, in my case, do whatever it takes to get that Monday makeup on.

I’m writing this blog from the floor while my toddler stacks rocks dangerously close to our WiFi router. I’ve calculated how long this can go on before a disaster strikes, so I’m using my time wisely. We’ve had a long series of late nights this week. Church events. Help Club meetings. All the good things we’ve prayed into for years. AND we’ve started some 18-month sleep regression shenanigans. (To be honest, this floor-rock-router situation is me resting up the next activity.)

Hi! Let’s take a Thursday deep breath, and do a quick self-inventory. How would you answer these questions about yourself? (They are today questions, but you can use yesterday if you are reading this in the morning.)

What did you talk about today? What kinds of words did you use? Did you build up or tear down? What do you look like today? How do you feel today? How are you talking about those things?

Benjamin is learning how to roar like a dinosaur. We had the greatest playtime in our front yard, roaring, exploring and breaking sticks. It was one of those blissful mom moments you want to hold on to forever. I snapped some selfies so I could savor these sweet times together.

I stretch my limits twice a week with heavy weights, high intensity, and online personal training with David. I scream-lift for 40 minute, and I love it! I’m getting stronger! Lifa (the best big brother ever) plays with Benjamin so I can get in the zone. The second I say goodbye to David and close my computer, Lifa and Benjamin come out with big, expectant grins. With practiced shock, Lifa says, “Oh, are you finished?” Everyone is ready for Mom to be back in charge, incapacitated or not. It’s charming. Endearing. And I feel like I could break.

My husband and I have a great “story”. We still laugh at its quirks and relish in God’s faithfulness when we tell others how we met and married. The details of our first encounters are not really our “story”, however. A story is written page by page and day by day.

Spring has sprung! It’s time to swim and play! None of Lifa’s clothes fit. New wardrobe time for our man-sized child! I’ve always just come home with new clothes and awed and amazed him by my amazing sense of style. Suddenly, Lifa has his own sense of style, autonomy and really cares about what he wears. I guess that’s a good thing!

Benjamin is my ride or die. I take that kid with me wherever I go. We sing Raffi (circa 1989) in the car together and adventure through forests, mountains, puddles and playgrounds.

Benjamin Lee Ladd is a full-on extrovert. Chris and I are two very introverted people with two very extroverted children. How does that happen!?! Benjamin has become very shy since COVID began. I’ve shrugged it off, noticing all the kids dealing with it and assuming he’d warm up sooner or later.

I’m back after a week long “brain break”. A little over a week ago, I noticed myself snarking and snapping at my family - verbally, with laser eyes, or through embittered thoughts that released themselves as breathy, exasperated sighs. RED FLAG ALERT! I don’t want to be an exasperated person.

Chris just went back to work at Southpoint Church after two weeks of much needed time off. He joyfully poured him heart and soul into the church six days a week for a year without taking a day off. He made a really wise decision to take some downtime for himself so he wouldn’t run dry physically, spiritually, mentally or emotionally. Chris is very happy to be back at work, and I find myself longing for a vacation! I snapped and snarled at my family last week because I was just too tired to manage my reactions.

One thing I love about the Help Club for Moms is that it’s practical. Mom or not, we all need help knowing how to live out God’s Word daily. The world is only getting louder and more erratic. God’s Truth is sure and steady. His voice often comes gently. So how do we live out quiet, steadfast Truth in a busy world - or in my busy house!?! You break it down. Small changes will change you.

Tomorrow we celebrate our 5 year anniversary! If you’re new to the Ladd Family - we are so glad you are here!!!!! Here is a fun little rendition our story I wrote right after we were married. I hope you enjoy the flashback as much as I did!

A week or so ago, I dipped low into that pit of desperation that every mom has probably known- the one where the only thought you can think is: “I’ll do anything to make this kid sleeeeep”. Forget the baby books. Forget the sleep training and the “they says”. I put Benjamin in the car, and we drove for a loooong time. FINALLY, he slept. I parked in a safe, guarded parking lot. I had planned for this. I even brought my work along with me. Instead, I sat there in crazy-eyed silence and sent equally crazy pictures to Chris. My work stayed untouched, and I stared through the windshield while my thoughts shredded my last remnants of sanity.

I am so thankful for these beautiful men and this beautiful life. Every day isn’t sunshine and roses… in fact, there was such an extraordinary toddler meltdown all the way home I ended the day with a migraine. BUT it’s these photos, these glistening moments in a flowery field, I will turn to on the cloudier days to remind me I am loved deeply and fully by this fantastic, flowery family of mine.

True love looks like a (very handsome) man who did the opposite of everything he would normally do for a day to make his wife’s dream come true. I love, love, love new places, exploring beauty and family outings.

Yesterday while I was trying to cook and clean, Benjamin was next to me pulling everything out of the cabinets to throw around the kitchen. It’s our working agreement. I handed him a shopping bag and empty granola bar box to add the to mix and kept working around him. The next time I looked down, he had swung that shopping bag over his head and created a cape, which he kept on for the rest of the evening. (The most adorable choking hazard.) Benjamin is too young to know he created a cape, but it stopped me in my tracks.

It’s 5:23am... I’ve had the whole house to myself for an hour. I’m full of coffee, worship music, and a good old fashioned quiet time. All by myself. In actual quiet. This one little power hour (plus about 9,000mg of caffeine) has me all jazzed up. I started by reading a devotion from the Help Club for Moms book ( If you’re a mom, any kind of mom, click that link and get that book!) I was re-inspired to create life-giving prayer habits and then read about faith heroes in Hebrews 11. I ended up with a long list of things I want to do and want to be...

There are so many voices, so many versions of the “truth” out there. But the REAL Truth, the truth of Jesus, will set you free. I have so many thoughts in a day... in a minute. Right before I sat down to write this, I took a shower to wake up my tired eyes and felt a thousand untested thoughts wash over me instead.