My husband and I went on an evening walk a while ago. We rehashed a painful season we'd traversed in the previous months and marked how God had used it for our good. The conversation went deeper as we turned a familiar corner in our neighborhood. Yes, we have successfully navigated external hardships... but what about the ones woven into our family DNA? My husband worried aloud,"Your personality has changed. You were so bubbly... laughing all the time.. and now I can see how heavy life is on you." I conceded that the relentless spiritual warfare, crippling corruption, decade of distance from family, and special needs parenting has dug deep, rugged trenches in my formerly light disposition.

Share Life. Find God. This is what it’s all about.

Watch this quick video for an encouraging story from this week.

AND MOMS! Search “Called to Worship” on the YouVersionApp’s Bible reading plans for a free 5-day devotional from me and Help Club for Moms!

“Put on the full armor of God so that you can stand against the schemes of the devil.” Ephesians 6:11

An object lesson of sorts.
*No brothers were harmed during the making of this video.
*No comment about dogs.

I’m re-thinking every parenting decision I’ve ever made.

The weekend did not weekend as weekends should. Wyatt took us all down with a flu he bounced back from as soon as the other kids got out of school on Friday. My own empty tank was certainly not sufficient to support Benjamin’s needs, and every moment dragged on like its own emergency. It is a euphemism, at best, to say we had a tough one.

Sometimes we call him “Frat Boy Wyatt” because he lives full throttle, like a youth freshly released in the wild. Wyatt does everything all the way - from chugging Powerade and sprinting through life to loving his brothers and full contact hugs. He’s intense. He is consolidated electricity, team spirit and goodness in one package. Enjoy a peek at this afternoon… just a regular day of Wyatt living life.

I recently spent an afternoon with moms ahead of me in their special needs parenting journeys. A familiar knot twisted in my gut as they shared about unenrolling their children from school. My personal nightmare, one I push down deep, was tea time conversation. You see, statistics agree with every story I've heard. Children with my son's diagnosis are often unable to stay in school and endure so much just trying to grow up.

One of the most valuable currencies in the Ladd family is power. The first thing Wyatt says when he wakes up is, “I have power to play!” When the little boys feel they have eaten enough, they flex their muscles to prove they have sufficiently refueled their power supplies.

We had a BEAUTIFUL morning at Kirstenbosch Botanical Gardens this morning. We were given a tour of a textiles exhibition, went on a short hike and fished for tadpoles with our bare hands. When it was time to head out, Benjamin’s legs buckled under him and emotion overcame him.

When the curtains close on 2025, my oldest son will be 18 and finished with high school. We walked through much together in his earliest years, but the stories are his to share now. I can confess, however, the sleep I've lost pleading with God that my first son wouldn't have to learn things the hard way. I have contended with the same Father who let His Son die for mine (who's actually His!) to spare my boy from wandering in the wilderness. But now I pray that he, along with our other sons, would know who they are in Christ above anything else... whatever it takes. Gulp.

My mom is the greatest celebrator. She flies across the world every April to be with us for Easter and family birthdays. We plan celebrations with great intentionality to accommodate our middle son's nervous system disability. He spends 364 days a year anticipating April 9th, when he gets to be the birthday boy. We want him to be able to enjoy as much of it as he can.

When the people wake up illegally early... Benjamin needs a down day... and Wyatt doesn’t do down.

Jam stayed home with Chris while I took Wyatt mall-walking on a rainy morning. We arrived an hour before the mall opened, and the boy lived his best life. He got his first glimpse of an arcade (my nightmare) and rode every ride. (Let’s never tell him you are supposed to buy tokens and actually make the rides move, ok?)

Chris traveled through South Africa earlier this month, and we’ve had the privilege of hosting many guests lately. Our usual, unwavering routine has been all over the place lately. But there’s nothing that can make the Ladds feel more like family than the kickoff of rugby season!

THIS IS OUR LAST RUGBY SEASON!!!

We had an EPIC time on Bree St! Thank you Young Urbanists s for the Open Streets Africa Experience. I was so moved by the power of passionate people to bring change to their city. THINK ABOUT WHAT WE COULD DO FOR GOD'S KINGDOM WHEN WE UNITE AND MOBILIZE!

The little Ladds lived their very best lives being able to move freely downtown while four blocks of a major road were shut down for cars.

I did a ridiculous thing. I ordered a walking pad to use for five days and return. I can explain. (A walking pad is a treadmill without handles to slide under a desk and walk while you work.)

My husband went out of town for EIGHT days. Our two youngest sons only attend school a few hours in the morning and struggled with Dad being away….

You might think mud pies are made with a bit of mud, sticks and leaves. Not our mud pie. Ours needed an additional 14 hours of co-regulation, copious screen time, a special picnic packed, and brute force to get out the door. It's even more than just that day...

It's in the daily choosing to do all the things you said you'd never do as a parent... and repenting for the earlier days when you passed judgment on others...

It's always having plans A-Z ready to action, knowing the preparation will likely get tossed aside and be unappreciated...

I joke with friends who tell me about their relaxing weekends that there's "no chill at the Ladd house". Benjamin has always required less sleep and more intense physical activity than all the parenting books said. During the extra-long days and nights, I've learned terms like "sensory seeking" and a profile of autism best understood as a nervous system disability.

But we found our rhythm: high energy, always moving, wildly caffeinated (me!), and full of connection and joy…

Wanna see Jam dance-hike? (Yes. Yes you do.)

Can’t get enough…

We called last week "our turning point or breaking point". An autoimmune disorder building in our five-year old's system is wreaking havoc, exacerbating existing autism-related complications. We were losing sleep, and our son woke before 4am, requiring more than we had to give. The worst of us collided as we each found our end points.

I was up late recently, rattled by the twists and turns of parenting a child with special needs. A teething baby demanded comfort just as I started to settle. One hour of sleep later, it was time for a new day to start! There was a redeeming moment in the nauseatingly caffeinated day that followed. All three kids were in the car, and my four-year old was practicing the Bible verse we were learning. My teenager said…